20 Things minus conscience
1. Call the babysitter from bed on my cellphone at 7:30 and beg her to come over and watch the kids so I could sleep in.
2. (Past item, like wish I would have...) Keep the $1100 I found blowing around the CVS parking lot.
3. Not feel bad about all the music I ask my husband to download.
4. Not mouth "sorry" when I pull out in front of someone.
5. Be as sarcastic as I am in my head OUT LOUD to the annoying moms at my art studio.
6. Just walk away when someone boring starts chatting me up at a social function, or for God's sake, the grocery store. That's not even a function. It's a necessity!
7. Paint a big sign that says THESE PEACE LOVING JERKS KICKED MY SON OUT OF THEIR PEACE LOVING SCHOOL and protest right next to the owners of the Montessori School who protest the war every Monday night in our little town.
8. Oh my God! Get over yourself annoying mom who wants art lessons RIGHT NOW even though the class is FULL!
9. Get my nose pierced.
10. Tell my in-laws off.
11. When I meet a phony, tell them as much.
12. Call an old flame's dad and find out where he is now.
13. Use said info to contact old flame.
14. See old flame.
15. Strike up old flame.
16. Become a chain smoker. Metaphorically. See #15.
17. Relive my glory days of sneaking into concerts and begging beer off cute guys.
18. Admit to my Christian friends that I really like General Hospital and chick lit.
19. Tell someone how I'm really feeling on the days when good, great, fine is so far from the truth.
20. Pretend I'm sound sound asleep when my daughter wakes up at 2am so my husband has to get her. Oh, wait. I already do that! Bad mommy!
posted by jillypoet @ 8:56 PM
3 Comments:
LOL! Hey, the old flame seems to be a shared list item---and, where do you think my "Get pregnant" idea came from?
OK--you absolutely can NOT tell anyone I said that! Or, thought that!! I never had 's#*' with the sweetie in the first place, so it would be completely without conscience if it were possible in the here and now. (plus, I was a wee bit tinier then, doubt he'd even recognize me)
Jilly, I need to refresh myself on adding links at Blogspot, but I'll try to email you and give you the info. :-)
No. No blaze going yet. Probably never. Can't bring myself to ask his dad about him. And would you believe, everytime I'm in my home town at a restaurant with my parents, his dad is there. I guess it's that conscience thing. It would make for great fiction, though. Hmmm... research maybe? Speaking of fiction, am reading a great old flame/pregnancy(!) novel, "We Are All Fine Here." Very funny.
You found $1100 at CVS? Cash? That would be hard to turn in.
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